Monte Carlos Analysis of Random blah, blah, blah

We have a family tradition of watching "Christmas Story" around the holidays. Every year we experience Ralphy's quest for an "official Red Ryder Carbon Action 200 shot range model air rifle".   He puts his heart and soul into a school assignment, "What I Want for Christmas."  When he turns it in, he sees his teacher in vision as she ecstatically clutches it to her breast and dances to the chalk board to write a huge "A", and, "plus, plus, plus, plus.. " Later in the movie when Ralphy  gets his assignment back, he gets a demoralizing "C+" accompanied by the words, "you'll shoot your eye out." 

Today when I presented my paper “Monte Carlos analysis of Random Thickness Errors in Triple Band Pass Coatings”, I didn't get any you'll-shoot-your-eye-out comments, but there wasn't the level of interest that I had hoped for. With close to a hundred in attendance from all over the world, other than a couple of "good paper" comments afterward, no one wanted to discuss it. That's not uncommon for these forums, but I admit to Ralphy-like delusions beforehand.

On the positive side, I apparently now have an honorary doctorate, or at least the moderator of the session thought so.  He introduced me as "Doctor Fuller." If I would have adhered to the lesson on honesty I heard in church last week, I would have corrected him. Practically everyone else on the program had the title legitimately. On occasion people assume that I do too.

I was privileged to share the same stage as Professor Macleod, who presented one paper immediately before me, and another one after. I’m honored that he remembers my name.  He is the reigning patriarch of optical thin films and dates back to the 1950's when the technology was in its infancy. He's royalty in my industry.  Disciples nearly bow in his presence.  Despite that, he is a very down-to-earth humble man. He must be pushing 80 years old. I normally see him once a year at this conference. One never knows when it will be his last.

Over the past year I've put a ton of time into this paper, much more than I would ever admit to my boss. It was a solid technical effort, certainly better than some others I heard in the same session. But in the end, like previous papers I've written, it will be published in an obscure technical journal which no one will ever read. Such is life.